FOMO or JOMO...Have we lost ourselves?

For the past few years, FOMO, or the fear of missing out has stuck with us. From the over abundance of social media to plans with friends, have we lost ourselves?

The dictionary describes FOMO as:

I'm sure you know this feeling...I know this feeling. When I've been scrolling through my Instagram or Facebook and BAM! I see my friends out having fun and I think, "What about me? I didn't get an invite...." and then I start to maybe doubt myself and my friendships and what may be happening in my life? But to be honest, the past few years have been "busy" for me...or so what my friends have told me. But if Netflix, monitored watching, (as I am sure they do), my analytics would be through the am I always busy? I'm still fun, right??????

But then wait a dam second. Just. Breathe.

Where does this FOMO come from?

Do I have a lack of attention span?

Do I need to be entertained?

Is my self esteem in question?

Is my friendship in question?

Will I die if I don't go, am not there?

And what about what I'm doing instead?

When FOMO rears its nasty head

To be honest, the FOMO I once had, started to disappear a couple of years ago, but every now and again, it rears its ugly head. I am in love what I am currently doing. I have a current love affair with my tailspin of cooking, posting, eating and sleeping, oh and binge watching Outlander. 🤫

But when a bout of FOMO comes over me, I look at myself and think, "would I be happier there or am I just perfectly fine what I am currently doing?" FOMO is an interesting thing...all of those notifications you get on your phone, the likes you receive and the 👍🏻create instant gratification and dopamine in your brain and it LOVES It!! It starts taking over and the more you get, the more you want - but when you don't receive as many as the post before, it becomes sad and depressing.

So take those notifications off of your phone and computer, you don't need to know every time someone "likes" your post of you eating an ice cream cone as big as your face! Limit the time you use on your phone and put it asleep at 7pm so you can spend time with loved ones and really start living! I started not using my phone between the hours of 7 pm and 9am. This break from my phone allows me to get into some good routines and treat myself right! More yoga, better sleep hygiene, morning workouts and more time with my bf...well, these are all good things and make me feel better about my life.

Aren't you sick of staring at your phone??? Keep reading..thou, please!

But, low and behold, JOMO, or the Joy of Missing Out comes into my life.

THANK YOU, GOD! The countless posts about being mindful has come mainstream! And maybe, just maybe we can all be saved.

Mindfulness and Self Love

JOMO isn't about just saying no to engagements, it's deeper than that. For me, it creates a wonderful cycle of mindfulness and self-love. You may be asking what the heck I'm talking about, but hear me out....

Being mindful about things is about doing things with intention, when, if done, turns into greatness.

- Less accidents occur, like stubbing your toe or dropping a plate.

- Better digestion, when adding mindfulness to eating, you will chew properly and aid your digestion. Which will elevate any digestive issues down the line. How great!

- Better organization, you can get ready for your next day, do some meal prep, laundry, minimize things...the list is never ending

- Less Stress! When you give yourself space and let the energy flow, it's amazing how the stress melts away. This takes practice....but I swear to you, you do not need to fill every second of every day with some thing. You may feel slight discomfort in the beginning, but it will get easier and be amazing, you won't want to give it up!

Which will lead to SELF LOVE. 💞

Self love isn't about taking baths and having facials. It's about being true to yourself. It's about being honest with yourself and

getting to know you, every dark detail.

When I started exploring self love, I did something really strange. I stared at myself in the mirror. I looked at every bump and hair, then I met my own eyes. I looked at them and started having an honest conversation with myself. About what? Everything. How I felt about my job, my relationships, about my thighs and body. What I really wanted to do and what I stood for. How I wanted my life to look and how I was going to do it.

I came to the point that if I couldn't trust myself, who could I trust? If I didn't love myself, how could anyone else? It forced me to face my deepest fears and be honest with myself about my regrets and failures but also my wins and accomplishments. It allowed me to most of all forgive myself for promises I failed to keep to myself. For the times that I brought myself down or had low self-esteem. I now trust myself. I can stand on my own two feet. I can proudly stand up for myself without hesitation or fear.

I love myself.

I hope you do too.

Try it. Just start shutting off your phone or forgetting it at home for the day. At first you won't know what to do, then you will see that you don't miss it all so much.

I leave you with this poem, by Leunig


With undoubted attention,


#2019 #fomo #jomo

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